And You Wonder Why

The Standing Dicks Conflict – Pt. 3: First Blood; The Battle of Urethra Ridge

***

The feminists
‘faux’
talk a good game
shamelessly
boarding
the bandwagon
of
cinematic gender fame
built
on male shoulders
moronic ultras
co-opting heroes
and
fictional divas
in the service
of
misguided ideology
Wonder Woman
most recently
whom
hitherto
they knew
little
except
she wears a vagina
failing to understand
that
Themyscira Island
was born
from a broken heart
caused by a God
not a man
silly clods caught
in the counter culture
of consumer slogans
having
probably
never read a D.C comic
yet
quick
to affix
box office success
to the feminine
and remiss
in praising
her male creators
whose sole purpose
was
the entertainment
of readers
mainly men
in adolescence
who remained loyal
to Diana
over generations
because
she delivered
tough talk
and ass whippins
to each villain she encountered
even friends
who rubbed her the wrong way
regardless of gender
an angry Amazon
on the wrong side of history
thanks to mommy’s vendetta
until
she met Trevor
and discovered
the world of man
fighting
alongside
Superman
and
the caped crusader
whom
she accepted
as equals
not
the other way around
as she went to town
beating down bad guys
for millions of fans
worldwide
blowing their allowance
on the latest issue
while
their gender opposites
bought dolls
and fawned
over Laura Ingalls and Jan Brady
and now
suddenly
believe
that women
on tv
and in movies
must somehow conform
and become icons
to faux causes
powered by ovulation cycles
as if
Sex & The City
ever gave a damn
about men’s emotions
or
the psychological damage wrought
by slutty Samantha’s insistence
on big dick sexism
as if
feminism
somehow
means
women of action
in this case
Wonder Woman
scaling down
her violent tendencies
and
instead
vanquish her enemies
with deep
meaningful conversations
snow whiting
an audience
that paid good money
to see
the Amazon Queen
come alive
in action scenes
bigger and badder
than they ever dreamed possible
while growing up
before
scores
of feminist imitations
conspired
to deny us
the right
to superheroes with vaginas
unless
they
can torture us
with tears
and
the phrase
“we need to talk”.

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