United We Fall

A letter, a plea, to Manchester United Manager David Moyes.

Dear Mr Moyes,

as Manchester United supporters and fans we’ve had to endure a lot under your reign, historic and record losses, boring football, mediocrity, and even worse, humiliation. We’ve put up with it, out of respect for Sir Alex Ferguson and in the belief that you will come good, with the expectancy that you will ‘do the right thing’ by tendering your resignation if it doesn’t work out. David, it isn’t working out.

Liverpool will visit Old Trafford later today; no United fan is expecting them to leave without the points, after all, you’ve spent all your press conferences singing their praises, making us a mid-table underdog, beggars even, with every additional word from your mid-table lips. You keep saying we’re getting better. We’re not. You kept on saying we’re fighting for the title. We’re not. You keep on saying we’re fighting for 4th spot. We’re not. Now you’re talking about winning four games straight. You’re mad. And nobody believes you. You keep talking like the season has 100 games: the season is almost over, Sir. Wake up.

Dear Mr Moyes, we’re not Arsenal, where one specialist in failure (sorry Smithson) resides – 4th place trophy is not our goal each season, neither is the continuous spouting of phrases with no bearing on reality – that’s Arsene Wenger’s job, dwarfed only by Liverpool’s quarter century of failure. Watching our team play, under your management, has become an herculean task, an exercise in frustration. We are Manchester United, Mr Moyes, not Merseyside or the Emirates. Wake up.

To err is human, as Sir Alex did in naming you his successor; your brand of football isn’t suited to our club. Most of us, globally, are not confident things will ever improve with you at the helm, rather, we deem it an act of irresponsibility bordering on insanity if the the Glazers allow you to continue beyond this season. David, please do the honourable thing soon – relinquish the reins.

Thank you.

p.s. if you win today, that changes nothing. Please go.

26 Responses to “United We Fall”
  1. Ha. If it wasn’t for the fact that you were absolutely correct, I’d be pissed right now my friend. Nice to see you back by the way man. Even if it is temporary.

    • lexborgia says:

      David Moyes has turned the theatre of dreams into a nightmare. The only thing that dulls the pain is watching Arsenal suffer (hahahahaha).

      • Arkenaten says:

        Here’s to buck-teeth strikers everywhere!

        • lexborgia says:

          Once bitten twice shy. I hope he’s already eaten.

          • Arkenaten says:

            I am not over confident but I think the ‘Scousers’ will have the edge over UTD defense.
            Even if Liverpool’s defense is nothing to write home about, I’ll be surprised if Moyes walks away with a smile on his face.
            We’ll see.. 🙂

            • lexborgia says:

              The edge over!!! They’ll probably have the edge and the hilt up our bums, thanks to the madness of King Moyes. Here we go, the moment of truth. I’ll probably add a supplement when the ‘drawing & quartering’ is done.

  2. makagutu says:

    Other than that I don’t give a wuss who wins in any football game, I find this letter to be a honest plea to the current team manager to do something good for once

  3. dhonour says:

    hmmm, I do believe I hear the chants of “Liiiiiverpooooool” coming from the television in the other room as I type this. While I am not invested in any way, shape or form in the EPL, I hope you get your wish.

    • lexborgia says:

      A big defeat (unfolding now) by LFC should help nudge Moyes closer to the door – we shouldn’t be subjected to another season of bread of water. We’ve had enough.

  4. mikesteeden says:

    Fine post – even as a Gooner I can say that. Charity is my second nature! Given that we have qualified for Europe every year since the old King died (although this year remains a tad uncertain) we’re not that bad. Just hope Moyes stays with you chaps a tad longer! Best of luck anyway.

    • lexborgia says:

      Arsenal wins today with sheer force of will, while Moyes takes us down the hill, to mid-table glory, beyond reach, of Arsenal’s 4th place trophy. 😦

      • mikesteeden says:

        Arsenal were very lucky today – and thinking about it your letter to Moyes is I believe polite enough to be sent/published in that you make the points without going on a rant – that must be hard to do right now. Personally I was pissed with United today in that I wanted them to stuff Liverpool (who after all have a crap defence).

  5. onemunchingmomma says:

    Not a ball fan, but I do tip my hat to you for a well written letter! Good to see you back, even if for a short moment.

    • lexborgia says:

      Just had to get that off my chest, our new Manager is a complete castastrophe, beyond anything we imagined or expected, a zillions km beyond worst case scenario. He reminds me of Baghdad Bob. Remember him?

  6. I am a Man United fan of many years standing, and this season has been a period of extended pain and humiliation. “When will it end” he sobbed

    • lexborgia says:

      Yes Pete. Humiliation is the key word here. It’s no big deal losing a game, but our style (his style!!) of football has become unwatchable, a horror show. We can miss a season of top4 football, but not in this manner. This is beneath Manchester United, and we shouldn’t have to put up with it.

  7. Michael Bennett says:

    I have been a Man U fan for a long time. Ryan Giggs continues to be my hero (the media is all lies!!!).

    Today, it was obvious that Van Persie wasn’t going to have a good game after 30 minutes. He wasn’t moving their defence around enough and he hasn’t got the explosive speed to terrify defenders when chasing over the top balls. It was crying for Welbeck. Rooney ran his arse off, hat off to him.

    Putting Mata on the wing is akin to buying Bundesliga’s player of the season (playing the #10 role) to put him on the wing. They are not wingers. They are creative talents. Putting them on the wing is like telling a dog to sit on the road while you take your other dogs into the park to play. Coming in and finding the ball is good but only if you are willing to get back out to the wing to support the RB/LB when they have the ball. Other…

    Actually, you know what? I can’t be arsed with this! Moyes out!

    • lexborgia says:

      He’s turning us into Everton Lite, and even they are better than us. Anyone can beat us at home now, or humiliate us at will. He brings on Cleverly, our worst player, to replace a player who was also bad but less bad, and an old defender (Rio) for midfield player when we’re 2 down. I can’t stand to look at him any more, or hear him spew nonsense and mediocrity. A good manager, yes, but no United Manager. I just want it to end soon. Fed up.

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